Gibson Guaranteed

  My stress level has been equivalent to a barely heated green pepper these days. Which is quite daring to say for a girl with my firing head gasket blowing anxiety tendencies. My secret to this recipe sounds extremely abrasive, so don’t say it out loud…. just in your head…

  I figured out that sometimes I care way too much about shit that shouldn’t concern me. I can’t save the world, nothing will ever be perfect, I have no control over certain situations. By taking a step back, I’ve noticed that my vision has become quite clear and essentially avoiding the pit of “OMG! OMG! Panic Panic Panic!”

  I drop and break a glass of juice all over the floor. “Ahhh, what ever.”

  My computer freezes and I have to restart it. “Ahhh, screw it.”

 I learn that my co-worker doesn’t get in trouble for sneaking out of work early. “Ahhh, fuck it.”

 I get another stupid bill for another useless charge a Dr. benefits for sitting on his ass. “Ahh, fuck it.” So I sent a unhappy card, paid the damn thing and it eventually gets resolved with-out a fuss!

 ~ I have to admit that the whatever, fuck it, screw it and I-don’t-give-a-flying-shit is not even fairly attractive coming from a lovely lady’s lips. So, I’ve learned to mellow out that expression to a pleasant “Ohhh, I’m not going to let it bother me.” But, every once in a while I like to sailor it up with a dirty junction of words that never fails to put a smile on my face.

                    ~~~~~

“Sometimes, you just have to let it go and leave it in the hands of a higher power.” Which is what ultimately has given me strength through these months of growing pains and change.

  My love, things are starting to work out for us. Our future is becoming brighter with each passing day. I love you M.

….

She made her way to work in her little black dress, knowing she would leave 10 minutes early in order to pay a visit to Mr. Ungst. She knew Ungst had gone too far and only Sven knew the absolute truth of the situation. But, Sven would never want Nina to worry, so he tried hard to protect her from Ugnst’s ridicule.

  Nina was tired, accepting that Sven was unable to contribute to the Lexus bills, on a used Saturn budget. It wasn’t his fault, he needed to recover from the cancerous illness that almost took his life. She knew healing took time away and she was going to be there for him. Nina not only loved Sven with all her heart, she also admired him in every light. He had the inner strength only another diseased soul could understand, his power to move forward was their driving force.

But, today she had enough bull shit …

  She parked the car and checked her deep mulberry lips in the rear view mirror. Sounds of a pissed off woman in heels raised the attention of quiet workers as she marched through the hallways. The door to Ungst’s office slammed behind her and she sat down face to face with a surprised old man in a tie.

 ”What can I do for you Nina?” Ungst folded his hands and sat back in his leather office chair.

 ”I am not going to tell Sven I saw you today.” She took off her round shades and placed them in her pearly white purse.

 ”Then, I am unable to talk to you. I am unable to speak about the matters of a client with out their consent.” He said rising from his chair, prompting to end the discussion.

 ”No. You are talking to ME, I recommend you sit down Mr. Ungst.” She pointed her finger towards the empty chair.

 ”You have no right being here. I think you need help and should seek medical attention.” He said as he lowered himself slowly into the chair.

 ”No. I believe you are trying to cover your ass? No? I think you should tape record this, Mr. Ungst. What are YOU trying to hide?” She opened her purse and lit a cigarette.

 ”You can’t do that!” His face flushed in rages of red and purple.

 ”No. I’m on to you.” With her lit cigarette she pointed to the book case behind him. “Are those medical files, Mr. Ungst?”

 ”Get out!” He jumped up and picked up the phone.

 ”I believe, you owe me some funds.” she sat firmly, legs crossed, maintaining a calm position.

… to be continued …

   I really hate to bring up publicity, the consumer’s wasteland, America’s television, and as CEO’s of network television make out like they are selling coke. And I really don’t want to discuss how I pathetically anticipated this week’s episode of American Idol, only to feel failed by 10 pm Weds. night.

   Have we traded talent for the gorgeous Blondie? Are you telling me America has chosen the awwww sooo sweet skinny beauty over a vivacious Irish lass? Come on! Are-you-fucking-kidding-me?! Why don’t we just tell the youth of America that talent mean shit, because as long as you look like a hot pin up babe you can get what ever you want?!!! I really hope I am wrong here? I really hope.

  I was sooo worked up Weds. night, I created a User ID on the American Idol website and rocked my thoughts on the comment page. I also told the American Idol live wire that ”I am never ever going to watch you again, because voters failed my heart of good judgement.” And I just know the American Idol live wire is probably begging for my forgiveness… but I’m not going to give in. Nope. I’m going to simply turn my head and walk away, like every other bad relationship in my life. The end.

  So, Ok. Maybe I’m hooked on the American Idol crack. I might just need a little bump to get me by next week.